Comics – Family Matters

Writer: Dan Parent*
Pencils: Dan Parent*
Inking: Jon D’Agostino*
Coloring: Barry Grossman*
Lettering: Bill Yoshida*
Original Publication: Cheryl Blossom, No. 14
Cover Date: August, 1998
Length: 5 pages

*Only the lead story in the issue is credited. I assume the credits apply to all of the stories.

Although I have the original issue, I’m reviewing this story from the digital edition.

Elaine arrives at Cheryl’s and begs her cousin for help. Cheryl asks Elaine what she’s doing here. Elaine says Cheryl’s “magic” wore off. Wait, we’re revisiting that story? The footnote even tells the readers to consult a three-year-old issue to understand what the fuck is going on – except it references the wrong issue: Cheryl Special #2 instead of #3. We’re off to a great start.

Cheryl agrees to help her while silently deciding to sabotage her to avoid repeating her past mistake.

Later, at Pop’s, Cheryl asks Dilton to go out with Elaine. Dilton immediately refuses…for whatever reason. Archie remembers Elaine as Cheryl’s “cute cousin” that visited “last year”. Archie’s endorsement of Elaine convinces Dilton that he wants to date her. Cheryl is happy, because this will keep Elaine away from Archie.

Back at Cheryl’s, she gives Elaine a bad hairdo. Elaine says she looks like the Bride of Frankenstein, but she really doesn’t; her hair’s just messy. Cheryl calls it “the Gothic look”, but it isn’t. Cheryl has Elaine put on a snowsuit, even though “it’s summer now”, because “reversible season wear is cool”. She also adds a boa. As for makeup, “the circus clown look is very chic”.

Cheryl can’t help giggling, which somehow doesn’t immediately clue Elaine in that all of this is bullshit. Instead, Elaine asks Cheryl why she isn’t wearing anything like this. She puts it off for later and sends Elaine to Pop’s to meet Dilton. She decides to follow closely to see the results. Clifford sees Elaine leaving through the window and asks why she’s dressed like that. Jason pops up out of nowhere and tells him that Cheryl’s trying to set her up. Clifford’s angry.

At Pop’s, Dilton is impressed with Elaine, mistaking her for an “avant-garde fashion model”. Elaine likes Dilton.

Watching from outside, Cheryl can’t believe it but is happy that, at least, Elaine’s not going to get anywhere with Archie.

Back home, Clifford and Penelope confront Cheryl over what she did to Elaine, ignoring Cheryl’s defense that Dilton really likes Elaine. As punishment, they make Cheryl up in the same way as she’d done to Elaine and force her to go out in public like that, which makes Betty laugh and think Cheryl’s gone fucking insane.

This story was okay, I guess, but it seems really odd to follow up on a three-year-old story and ask the younger readers to seek it out.


After the story is a 2-page “Dear Cheryl” letters column by Sara Algase.

Author: markmooreauthor

I love watching anime and superhero movies, and I love playing video games. I also write fan fiction and original fiction.

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